Understanding Laura

I am a crunchy oddball with too many ideas and too little time. Do you get me now?

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Daddy Inspired

While I love the name Hazel,
I think it's important for a father to be completely pleased
with the name of his child.

So, after much deliberation
and many many name combinations,
we have arrived happily at:

Delia Kate

Delia Kate was in a breech position during today's ultrasound. She was transverse (side to side, not up and down) at her last ultrasound. Tonight, at water aerobics, I dove headfirst into the pool in an attempt to flip her headside down. Flip she did...and then she flipped right back as soon as I angled my body toward the surface of the water.

Determined not to be breeched out of the birth center, I lay in bed tonight and gently nudged her head down and her bum up.

I can't be certain that she has moved into a head-down position -but I am feeling kicks in my ribs where I used to be feeling hiccups and hiccups in my cervix where I used to be feeling kicks. So I'm hopeful Delia and I have accomplished an early station-ready position.

Keep your fingers crossed that she doesn't flip herself again before 30 weeks!

Bag of Water

Last Monday, when Kellie started giving herself "injections" (using whatever pointy object she had handy - a fork, a crayon, a wooden bottle of catsup...) I felt it was necessary for me to explain the weekly doses of progesterone she sees Mommy undergo.

This is how my explanation went:
MaMa: Baby girl! Is there a reason you're poking your fork into your belly button?
Kellie: I'm getting my shot! It's okay - it doesn't hurt.
MaMa: Are you getting a shot like Mommy?
Kellie: Yep!
MaMa: Do you know why Mommy gets shots?
Kellie: wide-eyed stare
MaMa: Mommy gets shots to help keep baby Delia in my belly just a little bit longer.
Kellie: Oh, 'cause baby Delia is growing. solemn faced nod
MaMa: That's right, Delia is growing. And she needs a lot more time in Mommy's belly before she'll be big enough to come out. My shots are helping her stay in longer. You're a lucky kid, because even though you came out of Mommy's belly early, you were big enough to come home with Mommy and Daddy right away.
Kellie: Uh huh. 'Cause I was growing!
MaMa: That's right! You were growing. But your bag of water broke a little too early when Mommy's cervix began effacing. When your bag of water broke, it was time for you to be born.
Kellie: mindlessly goes back to dancing the fork and catsup bottle across her belly

There was no more talk of injections, shots, bellies, growing, so forth...

Until Delia's ultrasound today.

Kellie had been very involved with the ultrasound up to this point - shouting out the body parts she knew and telling the tech all about Delia growing in Mommy's belly. So the tech was being an awesome guy and including her in our conversation about Delia's growth, position (breech, by the way), and facial features.

Mom to ultrasound tech: What are you measuring there?
Tech: I'm measuring the amniotic fluid. Tech looks at Kellie and says, more specifically - The bag of waters.
Kellie: beaming pride I was a fish in a bag of water.
Tech to Mom: Did she just tell me that she was a fish in a bag of water?
Mom: puzzled chuckle Yeah. I guess she did.
Kellie: indignant that the grownups around her would chuckle at her very proud statement I was a fish in a bag of water! But then my bag of water broke and it was time for me to come out of Mommy's belly.
Mom: looks to Dad, then to tech, and hastily attempts to explain how Kellie came to the conclusion that she had once been a fish... in a bag of water...in Mommy's belly

I'm assuming her creative mind took a whole week to stew on my explanation of her early arrival. We used to keep a fish tank in her room and we'd replace the fish often as the tank's previous inhabitants would inevitably perish. While carrying the many fish from the car to her room, Kellie would often observe that they lived in a bag of water.

That's really the only connection I can see.

Sometimes her train of thought astounds me!

Monday, March 02, 2009

From the Mouths of Babes

Kellie has been doing so well putting herself to sleep this past week. Unfortunately, a lot of our forward steps were lost in the backward steps we took during the recovery from her cold.

So, after a particularly trying night, I was at the end of my rope. With my patience worn aggravatingly thin, I squatted down to Kellie's eye level and asked in my most concerned Mommy-voice - "Kellie, what is keeping you up tonight?"

The sweetest and most mature conversation I've ever had with my daughter followed -

Kellie: Oh, I'm just thinking.
MaMa: What are you thinking about about?
Kellie: The carnival - I can go on the carnival when I'm older.
MaMa: That's right. You can go on the carnival rides when you're older.

There is a carnival in town for Fur Rondy. We drive by it several times a week. When Kellie asks if she can "go on it", we tell her she is still too little to ride the rides, but she will be able to when she grows bigger and is older.

Anxious to further clear her mind, Kellie continued with what I believe is every last bit of information blocking her from a peaceful sleep.

Kellie: And Daddy too.
MaMa: Yes, Daddy can ride the rides, too.
Kellie: When he's older. And baby Delia, when she is done growing.
MaMa: Yes, when Delia grows up to be a big girl, she can ride carnival rides, too.
Kellie: Like a tree. When I get older, I'm going to grow a baby like a tree.
MaMa: A tree?
Kellie: Uh-huh. And animals. Like a tree and animals. Delia is growing.
MaMa: Delia is growing. Kellie, you're growing, too. Your body needs sleep to grow. When you sleep, your battery recharges - giving your body the energy it needs to grow big and strong.
Kellie: Sometimes we need new batteries.
MaMa: I guess so. But for healthy little girls, they just need a good nights' sleep.

Most of the things in Kellie's life that are broken or are not working can be fixed by a simple battery change. Consequently, Kellie's logical little mind has deduced that any and all problems can be fixed by a new battery. When we were waiting in the Chiropractor's foyer, she was treating a decorative tile a little too roughly. After explaining to Kellie that her touches must be gentle or the tile might break, she very solemnly turned to the receptionist and said, "Oh, I'll bring you new batteries." In her mind, new batteries would be the ultimate restitution if her clumsy toddler hands had caused the tile to break.

Kellie nodded her agreement and began to lie back on her pillow. Her eyes, nearly closed, popped open suddenly as she sat up with the last little bits of information rattling around in her all-too-tired head.

Kellie: When I am older - I'm going to make a baby, and a tree, and animals!
MaMa: Okay Kellie, when you're older - you can make a baby, and a tree, and animals. But for right now, you need sleep.
Kellie: Oh, yeah. So I can get new batteries. Like the play ground.
MaMa: Kind of. The play ground is closed - you're just tired. Do you think you can go to sleep now?

The playground at the Base Exchange Mall has been closed. It is being replaced by a GameStop store. When Daddy explained this to Kellie, she needed to see for herself. After seeing the paper-covered windows into what used to be her beloved play room, she reasoned that the playground must be broken. They must be fixing it by giving it new batteries. It's still a fresh event in her mind - we're trying to ease her slowly into the idea of never getting the playground back.

Kellie: MaMa - I love you. Sometimes we get in a car accident. And we beep the horn.
MaMa: I love you too, Kellie. Yes, sometimes we do get in a car accident. And sometimes we beep the horn.
Kellie: Oh, and then we go to the hospital. We see the baby - she says "wah wah wah."
MaMa: Yep, if we get in an accident, we go to the hospital. We might see the baby on the monitor.
Kellie: Oh, yeah. But she's fine.
MaMa: Yes, Delia is fine.
Kellie: Oh, she was just scared.
MaMa: Yep. Just scared.

After our car accident on the 10th of December, we went to the emergency room. Kellie was assessed and the doctor said she was fine. For me and Delia - they had some difficulty finding fetal heart tones with the doppler. Kellie was worried the sound of the doppler had scared the baby. This is about the time when she started saying "the baby says wah wah wah" on a regular basis. All through the exam, Kellie insisted this baby was a girl - she's never strayed from that belief unless prompted by adults. I believe she truly connected with Delia in that moment. She has been loving and concerned and excited and involved with every aspect of Delia's life since that day. At my midwife appointments, she straddles my hips, facing me, and the midwife works around her. Kellie loves to kiss my belly and tell the baby goodnight. Delia is on her mind frequently, so I'm not surprised this was one of the things racing through her thoughts as she fought sleep. I just love her tender little voice whispering, "It's okay baby Delia" followed by a kiss on my belly. And I love even more her recent desire to lift my shirt up so she can snuggle the baby.

Kellie: I want to stay up until five o-clock. It's the middle of the night!
MaMa: It is the middle of the night. What about - instead of staying up until five o'clock, you can be awake at five o'clock tomorrow evening? Would that be okay?
Kellie: Oh, yeah. Time for nuh-nights.
MaMa: Yep. Time for nuh-nights. Do you think you can sleep now?
Kellie: Oh, yeah.

Often, when MaMa loses her cool after many many night wakings with requests for food/playing/going downstairs/etc., I will say, "Kellie - it is not time for _______! It is the middle of the night!"

Finally, after two grueling hours of chasing her back to bed followed by a lengthy and surprisingly deep conversation, Kellie laid her head down and was immediately asleep.


MaMa whispers, with a quiet chuckle: I love you.