Jimmy Crack Corn

When I was a kid, I rollerbladed into a van and busted out half of each of my front teeth. The dentists I've seen over the years have told me time and time again that I'd need a root canal due to nerve damage. Well, one made it through the 12 years since the incident without a root canal. I've had caps on them and have always hated how discolored they are. I'm unable to bleach my teeth since the caps shade of whiteness won't change. I'd have corn teeth.

Well, say hello to Mrs. Corn Teeth!

I have an appointment tomorrow to have my teeth bleached. I have another appointment on Wednesday to have... (Drum roll please.) Crowns put on!!

After the Zoom whitening, my two front teeth will likely look very odd. It's only for two days. And then I'll have pearly whites! I haven't had pearly whites... well... ever.

What if I'm like Ross on "Friends" and my teeth glow in the dark? Whatever will I do?